Potty Training Update 5

As I said in my last potty training post, I decided to ease up a bit on Lily. Not only did she develop that nasty rash, but she was also becoming increasingly resistant. She only tries to go on the pot when it "suits her". So, I gave her a break for about two weeks, and then she got a little cold, so she stayed home with me the other day. I decided, "let's try this again". She wore only panties or nothing at all, and although we had many accidents, she was willingly trying and we even had one success. Hooray!

I hoped that we'd be able to stay on track through the weekend, and Saturday she woke up feeling better, but very cranky. I kept at the potty training anyway, although she was not as compliant about it. I caught her doing the "I have to pee" dance, and asked her if she needed to use the potty. She said "No", but kept on holding herself and dancing around on tip toes. I brought her to the potty anyway,  and this inevitably ended up with her throwing a temper tantrum when I tried to get her sit on it, thus resulting with urine everywhere- on the floor, all over the potty, on me, on her, on the sink...it was bad.

Mommy had a mini breakdown. And needed to go lay down for a while upstairs.

Paul was there to take over and gallantly cleaned up the pee mess so I didn't have to (this made me happy). I layed down for about 15 minutes or so upstairs, crying from the stress of the situation, and then finally came to the conclusion it was time to play hardball. I came to this conclusion because, a) I know she knows how to use the potty, but is just resisting me, b) she keeps getting rashes and diapers are furthering that, and c) she's almost 2 1/2 and it's time to move on from the diapers. 

Seeing something like this would normally make me go "aw!", but now all I can think is: "No more diapers!!!"

So, I went downstairs with a pull-up in hand (yes, I know you shouldn't use those, but we're trying them anyway) and calmly told her, "Okay, Lily. You can wear your diapers again. But, just know that diapers are for babies and you're a big girl now, but if you want to wear diapers that's fine. But, just so you know, babies don't watch TV, that's only for big girls." I told her this as I put her diaper on and she calmly looked at me, taking it all in, and said nothing. Since then, anytime she asks me if she can watch a DVD, I remind her of our "talk", and she whines, but then eventually lets it go. Yesterday morning was the first time in 3 1/2 days where she finally went and sat on the potty without me suggesting it, after I told her she couldn't watch her Minnie Mouse DVD. Then, before her bath last night, she willingly sat on it again and went pee! Hooray!, said Mommy. Whaaa!, said Lily. For some reason she finds it upsetting when she actually does what she's supposed to on the potty- what's that about?

So, is it working? let's hope so.

What do you think of this method? Does it sound too harsh? I honestly hate to give "ultimatum"-type deals, but I am at my wit's end. Am I being too hard on her? She has clearly demonstrated that she can do it, but just doesn't want to and I think it is because she is just being "rebellious". I have tried the reward method, the clapping and dancing praises when she does have a movement properly, the going panties-only and asking her every 15 minutes if she needs to go...nothing has worked, and I've been trying. They've been trying at the daycare. She holds it until she bursts. What am I to do?

Have you tried using a doll or other toy to encourage potty training?

Just for the record, these are things we have tried:

1. Potty-time books. Result: seemed to have no effect
2. Sesame Street/Elmo potty-time videos. Result: didn't even want to watch them
3. Singing and dancing praises when she does make something on the potty. Result: runs away crying
4. Giving her a special treat (fruit snacks) when she sits on the potty. Result: will only sit on the potty in order to get the treat
5. Reading a special book when she sits on the potty. Result: this actually has worked twice now
6. Going without diapers for 3 days in a row. Result: lots and lots of clean-ups and a cranky toddler who holds her pee in until she bursts all over the floor

Let me know what you think, and any advice and encouragement is greatly appreciated!!!

It's been a month for boo-boos

Lily is going through another growth spurt again, and this one comes with lots of boo-boos.


First of all, at her big 2nd birthday party with her cousin Rhys who was born just 2 days after her, (which was over a month ago btw), she got herself a big old goose egg the size of a golf ball on her forehead right as we were packing up the car, due mostly to her just being overly tired since she was unable to nap that day. After that finally started to completely clear up, she had another birthday party-related mishap after her other cousin's bday party and took a topple down the stairs. Luckily, she landed on the soft, cushy, yoga mat I leave at the foot of said stairs for just in case something like that were to happen, and she did not even suffer a single bruise or bump.


Now for some pictures to help lighten mood...

Lily's double chocolate cake made by Nanny

Cousins :)

Pin-the-bow on Minnie made by me (you know you thought it was store-bought!)

Lovely birthday girl, pre-bump

After the trauma of that event seemed to have finally worn off, on Easter she took a spill on Grandpa and Grandma's back porch step and scraped the side of her little face and landed herself a partial black eye. ACK!!!! I thought I could not take anymore of these little tumbles, and swore after that I'd keep her locked up in a padded room, but then I reminded myself that kids fall, and this was something I was just going to have to deal with and let her go through. THEN, earlier today (Friday) she took yet ANOTHER little topple when she decided it was a good idea to try and push her toy lawnmower on the back cement stoop, and when Grandpa tried to stop her, she fell over her lawnmower and landed face first onto the concrete pathway at the bottom of the stoop, DIRECTLY ON TO THE SAME PART OF HER FACE SHE SCRAPED LAST WEEKEND.


:::sigh:::


She now has quite the collection on her sweet little face, and I am almost too ashamed to take her anywhere, fearing the disdainful and scolding looks of other mothers I may cross paths with. I already did have a small incident the day after Easter when I took Lily to Target and the check-out lady decided to inquire about Lily's black-and-blue-and-scabbed face.


It went something like this:


Check-out lady: (looking at Lily in horror) gasp! What happened to her face?
Me: Oh, she had a little tumble yesterday. She's ok.
Check-out lady: What happened?
Me: (looking at her like is it really your business?) Well, she just had a little too much Easter excitement and slipped on the porch step.
Check-out lady: So she fell? (looks at me suspiciously)
Me: (quite seriously) Yes. She fell. She's ok, really.
Check-out lady: (still looking at Lily in horror) She's ok?
Me: YES.
Check-out lady: Are you sure?
Me: Do you have any children of your own?
Check-out lady: Yes, and one grandson.
Me: So, what? Did they never fall before?
Check-out lady: (silent for a moment, then-) Just be careful.


Oh, thank you so much, check-out lady. I really needed to know all that.

Current boo-boo collection

Ugh. So, I felt the need to vent a bit. The grandparents keep telling us it's normal and we can't do much about it except keep her as safe as possible, although it's inevitable she will get into little scrapes and bumps and possible injuries (I recall jumping off the swing set and breaking my right arm when I was 8).  It's part of growing up. She needs to learn how to fall down so she can pick herself back up, and all that jazz.


I'm still going to look into body padding and helmuts...


Anyhoo, does anyone else have any boo-boo tales to tell? Is there anyone out there who can make me feel less guilty? Poor thing...I just hope it doesn't get worse and worse...


And now for some Easter pics so we can end on a sweet note!

Finding her first eggs

I found 2!

Showing Daddy her eggs

Quite the haul (and part of the reason she fell down in the first place)

"There are raisins in these things?"

My pretty Easter sweetie

Have a great weekend!

( I have got to start putting more recipes on here again... )

Learning to Share

So, here’s an issue I’ve been dealing with concerning Lily lately…she’s not much of a sharer. Many people have told me she’s still very young and that she will learn to share eventually, and to just keep teaching her when the appropriate moment arises. Yet, others seem to think this could be an issue and that I should be firmer in teaching her this valuable skill. Case in point:

Monday I took Lily to one of our local parks and we had a few sharing “incidents.” First, she has gotten into the habit of carrying her beloved Bert and Ernie dolls with her wherever she goes now, and her travel companions caught the eye of another toddler playing at the park named, Nora. Nora pointed right at the dolls and started to head right for them, but her mom stopped her as soon as Lily started to tense up and cry. It’s really that easy to set her over the edge- one only needs to imply that they may want to check out the toy she’s holding or even simply looking at. 

Running around at the park with her best buddies

  Little Nora went on and on about Bert and Ernie, but her dear mom did a good job of keeping her cub away from Little Miss Crankypants Lily. Lily went about her business, but then another little girl who was probably around 2 ½ came over to us and started throwing a green ball around. It seemed that she was definitely trying to get Lily’s attention so they could play. Lily, on the other hand, was interested in nothing but getting that ball from the little girl. The little girl would throw the ball, then Lily would go after it, and then the little girl would go after it too, always getting to the ball first. This upset Lily, although it was clear to me the tot was merely trying to play a game with her.

She went back over to her mom in a confused state, and her mom in turn coaxed her into trying to play with Lily again by rolling the ball to her to she could roll it back. What a sweet lady, such good intentions…too bad she doesn’t know my daughter. Lily instead only wanted to obtain the ball for herself and run away with it, but the little girl’s mom persisted in trying to get them to play together, so I decided to use this time as a learning experience for Lily. It took about ten tried before I finally got Lily to let go of the ball for the little girl to chase and then return to Lily again, and it looked as if Lily was finally starting to understand the simple game of catch and toss. It was pure bliss for me, the Worrisome Mom, when that moment came where Lily looked at the ball in her hand, then looked at the little girl waiting for her to send it back, then let go of the ball and let it roll over to her without crying. I cheered her on and so did the little girl and her mom. What a breakthrough! We had forgotten about little Nora at this time…

It was when the little girl had sent the ball back to Lily again that Nora came out of nowhere exclaiming, “Ball!” and ran right up to Lily and snatched the ball from her hands. This resulted in an eruption of tears from both the ball players, Nora’s mom scurrying up to her telling her “No!” and each little crying girl running to their mother’s arms.

Nora’s mom looked so embarrassed, as I had when Lily kept trying to take the ball for herself. She got Nora to return the ball without much fuss and things quieted back down, but not for Lily. She appeared to be more confused than ever, so I tried to get her to go on the swings with the little girl she’d been playing with, but she was just too upset and indicated to me she wanted to leave. So, leave we did, but not before I said goodbye to the fellow moms and thanked the ball-owner’s mom for the encouragement. Unfortunately, I did not catch her or her darling daughter’s name, so I hope to see them playing at the park again sometime.

This is just a particularly amusing example of Lily’s sharing trials and tribulations; there have been many more where she just screamed and cried and one time she even poked the poor little girl admiring the same pumpkin in the patch as she right in the eye! (The little girl was fine, thank goodness!). So, now, Dear Readers, I am once again asking for fellow moms with toddlers- or with kids who once were toddlers -to weigh in on this and offer up any advice they may have. Is this “normal”? Is Lily still too young to really understand sharing? Should I continue to be patient and just let things evolve? Is there a helpful way you taught yours how to share?

Thanks a lot, and check back Friday for another yummy cookie recipe!

Bonus cutie :)

Toddlers and TV

If you would allow me to digress from my regularly scheduled post on healthy food, there’s another topic that’s been on my mind…

Before I had my Lily, I always felt that I would not let her watch TV until she was at least 2 years old, and then it would only be select shows (like Sesame Street) and for a very limited amount of time. Back then, I was thinking 30 minutes a day MAX.

But, then I found out just how much work it really is to raise a toddler and how draining it can be, and furthermore, how difficult it can be to find any time to do anything but look after said toddler. Being a work-at-home mom, most of the actual work I do gets done when Lily is napping; if I am not totally pooped by the time she goes to bed at night, I work until I am ready for bed myself. My point being, I had no (and still don’t seem to have any) down time.

We don’t have cable, luckily, but we do have the internet- obviously –and know what YouTube is. So, one day I allowed her to watch a couple of short videos of Sesame Street songs. At first she was intrigued, but not completely absorbed by it, and lost interest rather quickly. She was around 14 months old then, and since I noticed that it did capture her attention for a period of time, albeit a short period of time, I decided to reserve “YouTube time” for desperate situations, like when I was cooking and she wouldn’t get out from under my feet or if I had an important phone call I absolutely had to make and could not risk it being interrupted.

Eventually, 5-10 minutes turned into 20-30 minutes, then up to an hour, now Lily is 18 months old and I sometimes allow her to watch Elmo videos for over an hour! During those hour+ periods, it has been because she was sick and it was the only thing that would actually distract her from the pain or because I needed her to calm down to go to bed and just put the TV on in the background while she played. Often, when that has happened, she does more staring and less playing.

It bothers me, but at the same time I get so much done! It is quite a temptation that I am becoming increasingly less able to resist. Of course, I make sure that she gets plenty of actual TV-free playtime and I take her to the park and for walks regularly, but I still worry that I may be causing her to get into a routine that I will not be able to reverse. 

Image courtesy http://www.fairfaxsyndication.com/

We all are well-aware that watching too much TV is bad for our health; mentally because it causes our brains to become prone to ADHD-related conditions as well as zombie-like conditions, and physically because it makes us- children especially –fat and lazy. Also, at least 90% of what’s regularly on TV these days is total CRAP! I feel dumber after watching less than 5 minutes of any of the frighteningly popular reality shows that are on just about every channel. I DO NOT want Lily to think that watching them is okay!

I will also, of course, teach her that there’s a difference between educational programming and junk television when the time comes, but until then, I still wonder if it’s still unhealthy no matter what I allow her to watch.

Dear readers, what do you think? Do you let your young children watch TV, and if so, just how much is allotted? How do you handle situations when your child is in daycare or at a friend’s house? What are your thoughts on the subject overall?

Thanks in advance! I really look forward to hearing from you all!